Glass half empty? Pessimist. Glass half full? Optimist. But what if you just don’t care how much liquid is in your cup?
Meh.
That’s me lately. Not really excited about anything or upset about something, just sort of going through the motions and trying to figure out what will inspire me to start being me again.
Earlier this week I was driving to work, crossing over that long, low wooden bridge that I’ve often photographed at sunset. I realized I was driving on auto-pilot, and forced myself to focus on the fall colors around me, reflecting in the almost-still morning water. A movement out of the corner of my eye caused me to turn my head, just in time to watch a Bald Eagle deftly pluck a small fish from the creek and fly off.
If that’s not a sign to wake up and start paying attention, I don’t know what is!
So this week I’m forcing myself to wake up, to start taking care of things that matter and pay attention to the awesomeness around me. To know when to go to bed, when to stop working and when to play so I don’t always feel like I’m playing catch-up. To get back into the gym and increase how often I swim laps in the pool so I feel better in my own skin. To teach my Mom how to use iTunes, because she does so much for me without being asked. To download the pictures and video from my camera so I can share the joy in a 4-year-old’s birthday with her family on Facebook. To spend a day baking so I can send a “Thank you” package to a friend who helped me out.
Some of these tasks will be easier than others, but there’s a saying, “Fake it ’til you make it.” That attitude is going to help me drive my car to the gym today after work. (It’s also going to help me get out of my car, into my clothes and onto an elliptical!) Hopefully, somewhere in between faking it and making it, I’ll lose the “Meh” feeling*, find some unexpected joys and lose some extra pounds.
Speaking of extra pounds, keep your fingers crossed that I’ll also find the strength to actually mail out all of those baked goodies instead of crawling into bed with a good book, a glass of red wine and a platter of cookies and cakes!
* I’ve concluded that having a “Meh” day is fine — totally justifiable based on the comfort and pleasure factors of chocolate, fleece, a good book or movie and my own company. However, a “Meh” month isn’t so fine and must be addressed before I forget how to talk to people in person, the mountains of leaves make it impossible to walk to my front door, or I end up having to buy another size of “fat jeans” when I swore that this size was going to be my numerical limit for my closet and my butt.
One Wandering 